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Tyler: Now comes “Hello City.” I love it. An anti-ode to touring in tiny Canadian towns.

Well, cities. Name of the song and all.

It bops! It hops! It’s happy as hell despite the lyrical premise.

Peter: I feel bad saying this, but I do not like “Hello City.” I feel like this reflects poorly on me. I think most people would find this song delightful. There’s something wrong with me, is what I’m saying.

Tyler: Oh, there there. It’s okay. You can still live a full life.

Peter: I understand why you like it. I think most people would agree with you.

My heart is black, Tyler! I can’t appreciate a rainbow!

Tyler: You bear the mark of the devil! Cast you out!

Peter: Smite me!

Smite?

Tyler: Smite Barenaked Ladies, you’re saying. “Hello City” is all about offbeat BNL charm. I guess charm is a real offense in your dark world.

In all seriousness, that charm can just as well go down as irritating buffoonery. It takes all kinds.

Peter: No, no, I deserve the smiting. Sometimes I don’t like a song and I’m glad to tell people about it because it’s objectively horrible. “Cherry Pie,” for example. “Hello City” has a lot going for it. I really do feel like I’m exposing a flaw in my character by not liking it.

Tyler: I wouldn’t ding your character for this one.

Peter: Let’s see how the rest of this goes.

Tyler: Up next is “What A Good Boy.” All about this song as a teenager. Not so into it now.

Peter: It’s got a real ’90s Modern Rock radio sound.

Tyler: It’s fine. Very dramatic. Soundtracked one of my many ill-advised overwrought adolescent infatuations.

Peter: I can see that. It’s that kind of song.

I kind of like this one. I feel like I prefer the songs where they aren’t being clever.

Tyler: Way back then, I frequented online chat boards for favorites like Oasis and BNL. One post supposed that “What A Good Boy” is written from the perspective of a gay man. I’m not convinced, but that’s one vivid memory.

Peter: Oh, wow. That’s going deep.

Tyler: Those fans don’t play.

To “The Old Apartment!”

The band’s biggest American hit before “One Week.”

Peter: This was always my favorite BNL song.

Tyler: It’s a good one.

Peter: The guitars are louder on this one. The whole thing is heavier.

Tyler: Did you make the mistake I made, thinking the narrator is breaking into his ex’s place?

Peter: Yes! That’s not it?

Tyler: Nah. They moved out together, to an old house on the Danforth, a Toronto thoroughfare. Narrator goes back, breaks in, and, despite saying he’s happy in the new place, decides that he wants back the memories, the time, at their old apartment.

Peter: Interesting!

Okay. I’m hearing it now.

Tyler: One thing I noticed during a listen just today is the character’s predilection toward violence. Punches a hole in the door, tears the phone out of the wall. This is a darker song.

Peter: It is.

Which is why it appeals to the black hole that is my heart.

It’s probably still my favorite BNL song? It’s got those crunchy guitars. I like that.

I like the sort of eerie-sounding pre-chorus.

Tyler: It’s a rock-solid single from the guys’ otherwise-underwhelming third album. In cracking the States, too, it served an important purpose.

Peter: Yeah, it was pretty big.

Here in the States, I mean. I can attest to that. As a 100% real American.

Tyler: Sounds like you’re advertising yourself as meat.

Peter: I’m just saying I’m not secretly half-Canadian or anything like that.

Tyler: Hey now! I’m proudly half-Canadian.

Peter: I kid. I wish I was half-Canadian.

Tyler: Instead, you’re just an American with an asterisk thanks to the Duck Duck Grey Duck nonsense.

Peter: It’s a callback! Drink!

Or don’t. Not trying to encourage bad behavior.

Tyler: I played my share of drinking games. Binge-drink responsibly!

Not really. Binge-drinking doesn’t work, on multiple levels.

Peter: “Life, in a Nutshell” is not a favorite of mine.

Tyler: Sex! Barenaked Ladies-style!

It’s a little crass and kind of gross. “She’s like a baby, I’m like a cat/When we are happy we both get fat.”

Peter: Yeah. The line about her Barbies always doing it on the first date is, too.

Tyler: “Now she’s with me/And so there’s never any need for them to demonstrate.”

Sizzle!

Peter: Did you have Sizzler in Canada?

Tyler: I recall Sizzler at some very young point. We took road trips into the States, though. Could’ve been there.

There is a tasty roast chicken fast food joint called Swiss Chalet.

Peter: We were there once a decade or so ago and enjoyed Tim Hortons? Is that the name? We have some here now, I think.

Tyler: Yeah, they’ve ventured into American markets. Canadians swear by their coffee.

Peter: I think it was good. We got it more than once.

“Life, in a Nutshell” rolls right into “These Apples.”

The little jammy entrance is the best part of this one for me. I wish they would jam a little longer. And I am not a jam band guy.

Tyler: I like it fine. Ed sounds great, the lyrics are a bit wacky but not overwhelmingly. This is one, incidentally, that a different hardcore fan on those ancient chat boards broke down so thoroughly that they claimed Robertson himself commended their interpretation.

That being that the narrator and his lady keep coming at each other at odd angles—he thinks the apples are delicious, she points out that that “Delicious” is the kind of apple he’s eating.

Peter: That’s interesting. I listened to this a bunch of times but I feel like I still missed a lot. The lyrics can be quite dense. Lots of wordplay and whatnot.

Tyler: More Canadian talk. In “Life, In A Nutshell” it was “pencil crayons.” Here, in “These Apples,” it’s Ed name-dropping Lethbridge, a town in the western provinces.

Peter: Pencil crayons? Sounds like a Duck Duck Grey Duck situation.

Tyler: Colored pencils. Oh yes.

Peter: I like the Canadian-isms. Gives it a vibe.

Tyler: We’ve come at last to the big finale. “If I Had $1000000.”

Peter: I heard this one a lot.

It was a fan favorite. I’m basing that on my college friend’s friend.

Tyler: Here’s the thing. It’s a thoroughly fine song. It closed the main sets of their shows back then. But, they’d improv each interlude, and fold in hyper jams connecting popular songs of the time. All very fun. The problem here on Rock Spectacle, is that the gags are either set-up-free or just don’t work. At least on the CD there was a buried bonus track of the initial story about the old lady and the “Bryan Street Theatre.” That’s still stupid, unfurling the humor backward, but it at least offered an explanation. Now, streaming, the bonus tracks aren’t there. This version of “$1000000” thus makes even less sense.

I don’t blame them for leaving out the snippets of other artists’ tunes. But man, you gotta lead up to those jokes.

Peter: I was going to say the banter doesn’t do it any favors. I’m sure it was funny at the time.

“Kraft dinner!”

I know that one!

Tyler: Fans would pelt the band with it!

Peter: Beats underwear!

Tyler: Apparently it was pretty painful. Especially when dopes chucked whole boxes of the stuff.

Peter: Okay, that’s a good point.

I can see this being fun in person.

Tyler: It really was. There’s an innocence to it.

Peter: I always love when the audience sings along.

Tyler: Page quieting and then hyping the crowd is super-fun. This recording is a lousy example of their onstage abilities, but that moment still gives me a little chill sometimes, so much does it bring me back to when these tunes meant all the world to me.

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