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Peter: I think we can do this in one night.

Tyler: Seriously.  We must.

I listened to this beast once and set it aside until now.  I’m not proud of this.  But we’re talking Ringo the 4th here.

Peter: You cheat!

I listened to this six times!

Tyler: Did you really?

Peter: I really did.

Funny story…

Tyler: Do tell.

Peter: As a child, I traveled to Canada to go fishing. Ever been?

Tyler: I was born in Toronto.  First six years of my life were spent in TO.

Peter: You’re Canadian?

Tyler: Dual citizen.  My folks are American.

Peter: Wow! That’s very cool. I had no idea.

I’m from Minnesota. The “Land of 10,000 Lakes.” Have you heard that before?

Tyler: I have.  I’ve been in MSP a couple times, visiting an uncle and aunt.

Peter: Oh, I knew that. Anyway, I liked to fish, and we have lots of lakes, but most of them are encircled by vacation homes and cabins and the like.

When I was 10 or 12, I got to go to Canada to fish. We drove like 12 hours north and it was very beautiful. It was wilderness.

I’d never been fishing on a lake that wasn’t entirely encircled by cabins/vacation homes. To be on a lake with more than 99% undeveloped shore was a revelation. We’d land on some remote bit of beach to eat our lunch and I’d wonder, “How many people have sat in this exact spot before me?” It’s not a bench at Disney World. It felt very meaningful to be one of the few people to have ever experienced that exact spot of land.

I’m telling you this because there was a point earlier this week, just after finishing my 6th time through this album, when I wondered, “How many people have ever heard this all the way through six times?”

Tyler: Six!

I don’t think the mixer or engineer heard it that many times.

You really took me to the woodshed.  I figured this was a gag.  You are committed.

Peter: Obviously I’m not the first person to listen to the whole album six times, but I don’t think it’s a huge number. I don’t see someone taking this home, listening to it all the way through, and then deciding to do it again five more times. I’m not saying it never happened, but I think I joined a very select club. There aren’t many of us.

Tyler: Did you subject your wife to this?  Your son?

Peter: I did!

Tyler: Oh, Jesus Christ, man.

Peter: My wife normally doesn’t offer strong opinions. I think I played her two songs. She said, “I don’t like this album.”

To be fair, I don’t hate this album. In fact, you and I chatted briefly over the weekend, and I said, “It’s not bad!” Or something like that.

Tyler: Yeah, you noted that it wasn’t as bad as expected, I believe.  I think it’s because we were expecting something rancid.  This one’s not rancid.  It’s just…something.

Peter: I think that grows with repeated listens. It’s kind of a sad record. There’s a certain darkness underlying the very polished production. It has real divorced dad/mid-life crisis energy.

Tyler: There’s a barroom edge, too.  Ringo struggled with alcoholism well into the late 1980s, and some of these vocal performances bear that out.

Peter: Yeah, he’s clearly not in a good place here.

Okay, let’s do it. Ringo the 4th.

Tyler: “Drowning In The Sea Of Love.”  Quite an opener.  Ringo sounding ragged from the jump.

Peter: Look, we all know what this is. It’s a solo Ringo Starr album. It can only be so good, but I actually like this one.

Is it better than “Hot Stuff?” Compare it to “Hot Stuff.”

Tyler: Fuck you, Glimmer Twins, we’re blasting Ringo!

Peter: It’s way better than “Hot Stuff!”

This is a cover. I was not familiar with the original.

I assume it’s better?

It’s in the style of the dance music of the time. They could play it in the discos!

Tyler: I hope, I truly hope, that there exists a 12” extended dance cut of this behemoth.

Peter: That would be amazing. Someone should do that.

Okay, let’s move on.

Tyler: I wish “Tango All Night,” this next song, was an actual tango.

I guess you might be able to pull off a semblance of a tango to this, in the sense that you could find a way to tango to, like, “The Living Years.”

Peter: I didn’t think of that!

Shout out to Mike and the Mechanics.

Tyler: That song is more depressing than Jeremy Piven’s return to active work.

Peter: I taped it off the radio when I was a child. That’s a thing we did when I was young.

Tyler: Hell of a song to tape off the radio.  It’s “The Living Years!”

I taped the lead single from Hootie’s third album off radio.

Peter: Nice! Take that Generation K. Or whatever it is now.

Does this song owe something to “Margaritaville,” which was released earlier in the year?

Tyler: I hadn’t thought of that.  There are absolutely echoes.

Peter: Alright, the next one is “Wings.”

Tyler: Such a weird move.  It should have a B-side called “Plastic Ono Band.”

Peter: (beat)

I just got that.

Tyler: Beatle nerd humor!  I’ve been to Beatlefest twice.

Peter: Nice!

Tyler: I also can tell you that it’s now called “The Fest For Beatles Fans.”  Gotta be a legal thing.

Peter: It’ll always be Beatlefest to me.

I actually like this one. It was the lead single in the U.S. It tanked.

He re-recorded this in 2012, so he must have liked it.

Tyler: It’s got a groove?  I mean, hey, you pointed it out.  This is Ringo solo.

Peter: Right.

Okay, next. “Gave It All Up.”

Tyler: This song is mournful.  What is it doing here?

Peter: I think it’s just something he could sing?

It kind of rambles along.

Tyler: They felt like they needed a ballad.  They came up with this.

Peter: “Will I ever learn the meaning of life? Will I learn it in time?” is some heavy wondering.

Feels a little out of place on this record.

Tyler: It’s all so damn odd.  We’ve got both lonely cowboy harmonica and soul-group backing vocals.  Ringo fusing genres!

The next ditty picks up the pace, alright.  Are you ready to get “Out On The Streets??”

Peter: The song rules. It’s super bad.

But you should listen to it.

Tyler: What a piece of music.  Breathtaking.

Peter: It’s something!

Tyler: I can feel the grit of the naked city.  I taste the blood-tinged air of Gotham.  I know concrete pain.  I’m “Out On The Streets.”

Peter: Exactly! It’s Ringo’s “Shattered.”

Tyler: The sound effects predate George’s use of race cars in our old favorite, “Faster.”  George thievery!

Peter: It culminates in a sort of spoken word bit.

Tyler: It sure does.

Peter: Ringo gets mugged. Things get heated. Let’s move on?

Tyler: We’re really in a stretch here.  “Can She Do It Like She Dances” coming in hot.

Peter: This song has not aged well.

Tyler: I don’t know that it was ever particularly proper.

“Some girls get off by putting on a show/But when you get them home the show is over.”  Oh, Richie, you charmer.

Peter: I know! It’s a huge own goal! You’re telling on yourself.

Tyler: Zero-percent chance the narrator of this song is in any shape to do anybody.

Peter: This is what I’m saying about the divorced dad/mid-life crisis energy.

It’s gross. Let’s just keep going.

Tyler: I used Wikipedia to check something, and found out that our next song, “Sneaking Sally Through The Alley,” was written by Allen Toussaint!

Peter: Hey! Well, that’s something.

It’s got a lot of energy.

It’s all very polished. The problem is Ringo. There’s just no way around that.

Tyler: This shouting he gets up to is not easy on the ears.

Peter: He’s trying, but it’s just not there.

Let’s keep going.

Tyler: A little soft rock breaking the pattern. “It’s No Secret.”

Peter: Yes. Soft rock.

It drifts by.

I’ll say this. It’s better than Some Time In New York City.

Hot take!

Tyler: Oh snap!  What will he say next??

Peter: Stay tuned!

We’re so close.

Just two songs left.

Tyler: Can it be done?  Do we need a part two to break down “Gypsies In Flight,” the penultimate track?

It’s not bad.  It really isn’t.

Peter: It’s not bad. You’re right.

This is more of that divorced dad/mid-life crisis energy. He’s had another meaningless relationship and he’s processing that.

In song form.

It’s a ballad.

Tyler: He sounds like he’s putting a little effort into the vocals.  Singing to the song, not shouting or purring or whatever the hell he’s been doing up until now.

Peter: It’s a better fit.

“Simple Love Song.”

Is next.

Tyler: Eh, it’s solid.  Happy Ringo, happy listener.

Peter: This sounds like an ’80s sitcom theme!

Tyler: Ringo! coming Thursdays this fall on NBC.

Peter: I’d watch. It’s funny because I said the same thing about songs on the Paul and George albums we did.

Tyler: Now all we need is a John song like something offa Mr. Belvedere.

Peter: RIP Mr. Belvedere.

Okay, did we do it?

Is it done?

Tyler: My God.  One-and-done.  The almighty dream.

Peter: Ringo the 4th! I’m in the 6 (or 7) timers club. What a journey.

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